Top 5 Challenges I Face As A Mum

There is absolutely no doubt, being a mum is the best job in the world.  Nothing else compares.  My tots give me so much joy every single day.  They are adorably sweet comedic geniuses and I am forever in awe of their ability to make everyone around them smile from ear to ear.

Yes, being a mum gives me a sense of fulfilment that cannot be filled by any other feeling, or experience but I have many struggles along the way.  I thought I would share my top 5 challenges with you all.  Here we go:

  1. Balancing work and home.

Like many other mums out there I work full time and balance this with my home life.  Leaving at 6:45 every morning, barely getting any time with Letoya & Ethan is really difficult.  I often arrive at work, sit in my car in the car park reflecting on what I have just left behind and what I am missing.  Work is often very stressful and when I get home, I really want to spend time with Letoya & Ethan, but balancing that with homework, making dinner and attempting to keep my house looking less like Toys R Us and more like a home is a challenge.  I always make sure I have time to play with them for even a short time, read them a story and tuck them into bed.  I just miss them desperately when I am away from them and feel such guilt for not being able to take them to school and be there when they get home.  Rationalising it, I see it as an investment in our family security & their future, but who really knows if it is worth the cost of missing so much of their childhood.

ethan 0103

2.  Being patient

Having both a 7 year old and a 2 year old, I encounter different types of behaviours that would test even the Dali Lama.  My 7 year old daughter Letoya, is so confident and has will power like nothing I have ever seen.  My 2 year old son is a spirited bundle of beans that has so much he wants to say.  At times, this can be very testing.  As much as we all try to keep our cool, when you are being pulled in so many different directions, with tantrums in the ‘terrible twos’ and strongly opinioned seven year olds that question every instruction, it is not easy.

A perfect illustration, as I was telling my close friend, ‘How is it that I have said the word cheese 10 times before 8am?’.  ‘Is this a challenge every mother has?’  After refusing to let Letoya have cheese to eat at 7 am,  at least twice, Ethan overheard our discussion and before long they were both pleading with me for some cheese.  Fast forward 15 minutes and I have said the words ‘no’ and ‘cheese’ at least 10 times.   Thankfully I can look back and laugh at the sheer ridiculousness of the situation, but that Is not to say that all encounters are so easily laughed off.  I have come to realise after 7 years of parenting experience, you have to pick your battles.

3.  Teaching my children right from wrong

We are all faced with moral dilemmas from the moment we wake until the moment we sleep.  Navigating through life as an adult, knowing what and how we should be operating isn’t easy.  Passing this on to our children, is crucial to their personal evolution, and no doubt a hard task.  My fiancé and I try to reinforce sympathy and empathy as values, encouraging both children to treat others with love and care.  When they are faced with testing situations, children often act emotionally.  As much as possible we try to get Letoya and Ethan to think before they speak and act, considering other people’s feelings.  Above all other things we want to raise our children to be kind, caring individuals.

toya 0103b

4. Mornings & Bedtimes

No doubt the most challenging times of the day, mornings and evenings present all parents with a multitude of tasks, with sleepy little humans who are not always as enthused as we are about getting them done.  We are all early risers in our house, and I wake at 5 am on weekdays.  You can guarantee that the moment I step one toe onto a creaky floorboard, my two are awake and there is no chance of them sleeping for any longer.

Throw two tired tots into an early morning work/school rush and we have a recipe for chaos.  As much as best intentions set the framework for a calm morning, things don’t always go to plan.  Some mornings I can spend a precious 15 minutes discussing what cereal is on the menu for breakfast, negotiating somewhere in the middle for a non-sugared variety. Showering and attempting to put my make-up in the semi-dark is definitely an interesting feat.  Arriving at work I usually look somewhere in between pantomime star and bleary eyed party-goer.

This being said, bedtimes are usually calm, up until it is required to actually remain in bed and go to sleep.  That is when the fun really begins.  It is truly remarkable how many questions/queries/problems my little darlings have in or around the 30 minutes following their being tucked into bed.  When they finally surrender to their tiredness, I love to creep into their rooms and just gaze at how absolutely perfect they are (and try to sneak an extra kiss goodnight in!)

5. Valuing the right things in a consumerist society.

I often think that children are like magpie’s, drawn to anything bright and shiny.  And who can blame them?  When I take a brief moment of reflection and nostalga, looking at my childhood,  I recall toys and television, but it was not present in the abundance that it is today.  As parents, we are battling with the commercial breaks, online advertising and increased awareness that all children now have.  Having the ‘latest’ and ‘best’ of everything seems essential to survive socially.  As all parents do, we try to keep our family-time balanced with both play & time dedicated to being together.  We continually reinforce the importance of people and the time that we have with those we love.

We all have our own parenting challenges, but who would have it any other way? Certainly ot me..

Much Love,

Lisa xx

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44 Comments

  1. March 5, 2017 / 9:19 pm

    Oh Lisa, I am so with you on these although I am a work-at-home Mum so my ‘work stresses’ are slightly different. Parenting is most definitely a challenging time and a steep learning curve but i wouldn’t have it any other way 😉 Well done Mummy, you look like you’re doing an amazing job to me xx

    • wonderlingblog
      March 5, 2017 / 9:25 pm

      Thank you, that is so kind of you to say! We all try as best we can. There seems to be so many elements to parenting that you can never really anticipate or plan for, but it is definitely the best part of my life x

  2. March 5, 2017 / 11:28 pm

    Mama, I am right there with you on all 5 points!! I have a 2 YO as well and everything from bedtime to raising her to be a good person while juggling everything in life AND maintaining your own patience. It is exhausting. The best thing I have every done, but exhausting none the less. Thanks for sharing!

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 7:15 am

      Thank you Heather, they are such good negotiators from such a young age aren’t they?

  3. March 5, 2017 / 11:37 pm

    Wow! I love your honesty. I love that we are at a time where women can really be honest about the challenges we face when raising our children. I have a 17 year old son and a 13 year old, so a bit older than your children but the challenges change a bit the older they get. It is a different kind of energy but always a challenge. I find the older my son gets the more of my demons and short comings I have to face. Children and the love we share with them is nothing short of amazing. 😛

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 7:17 am

      Erica you put that so beautifully. All we can do is try our best to guide them on the right path and hope that they are happy!

  4. Richard
    March 6, 2017 / 1:46 am

    Hi Lisa,

    I adored your article so much. It really brought to light a brand new perspective that often times many people don’t think about. Thank you!

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 7:21 am

      I am really pleased to hear that you enjoyed it Richard, thank you.

  5. Gregory Pozo
    March 6, 2017 / 2:11 am

    I congratulate for not giving up on your dreams and keep raising your family.

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 7:21 am

      Thank you Gregory, we all persevere with things we love most don’t we?

  6. March 6, 2017 / 8:36 am

    I love your article so much. You are a strong woman, raising your kids and not giving up on your dreams!
    Congrats!

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 12:06 pm

      Thank you, I think women empowering other women is something that needs more and more promotion!

  7. March 6, 2017 / 8:38 am

    Woow to think i was alone in this. Am really struggling to strike a balance between work and home…

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 12:06 pm

      I think every woman is nowadays. Women have full working weeks & have to fit in everything else around this. It isn’t an easy task, but definitely a rewarding one..

  8. March 6, 2017 / 8:46 am

    Patience has been my biggest challenge at times too. I love my children dearly and they are great. I have definitely learned more patience through being a parent.

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 12:04 pm

      I think you really do learn so much as a parent, about who you are. Thank you Kylie!

  9. March 6, 2017 / 9:29 am

    You have very nice family! Amazing post! 😀

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 12:03 pm

      Thank you very much for the kind words!

  10. March 6, 2017 / 11:56 am

    Such an amazing post! All mothers face challenges style different from others. I work from home so for my business around my kids but still encounter issues.

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 12:02 pm

      I am really pleased to hear that you enjoyed reading it. It isn’t an easy job you are right!

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 12:08 pm

      Thank you for the lovely comments.. they are as sweet as pie most of the time haha. I think having children does give you some serious grit!

  11. March 6, 2017 / 12:26 pm

    You just express my words from my mouth. I have two sons. As a working mother, I have to face this obstacles you said. And I always try to enlarge their dream everyday…

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 1:24 pm

      You sound like a wonderful mummy!

  12. March 6, 2017 / 12:27 pm

    Really thought provoking, that work life balance thing is a killer, I am sat at my desk on my lunch break right now catching up on blogs and thinking about what my little one is up to at the childminder today. Mama guilt always.

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 1:25 pm

      I totally get that.. I am counting down to my next annual leave!!

  13. March 6, 2017 / 12:44 pm

    You do learn to ‘juggle’ when you are a mum. I’m self employed so I can often work at home but I also home school my 2 girls who are 12 and 9. Finding quality time is a real struggle a lot of the time.

    Well written article, thank you.

  14. March 6, 2017 / 2:18 pm

    Mornings and bedtimes…I feel like that is not mentioned enough! It really is a challenge and goes hand in hand with patience

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 5:23 pm

      Definitely! Unfortunately that is when we are most tired too.. the perfect storm!

  15. March 6, 2017 / 5:12 pm

    Thanks for sharing your challenges. I face the same ones. I think its great to know that your not alone in your journey and that other moms are going through the same thing.

  16. March 6, 2017 / 6:06 pm

    I don’t have children yet but I bet that as long as you provide love and a stable environment, you are doing amazing!

  17. March 6, 2017 / 7:20 pm

    I face all of the same challenges that you are facing right now. I think my biggest one is being patient. I feel like I lose my patience sometimes and I feel guilty and hate myself for it.

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 9:42 pm

      I have exactly those feelings. Usually in the morning when it is a little more stressful and then I get to work and feel awful. We have to remember we all make mistakes as much as we love and cherish our little ones.

  18. March 6, 2017 / 8:58 pm

    I wrk from home, so my stresses are different: like working with screaming kids around. haha But, I completely relate to all of these. So well written and beautifully said.

    • wonderlingblog
      March 6, 2017 / 9:45 pm

      I am in awe of the fact that you are able to work at home. On the odd occasion I have attempted it, my work laptop is under constant attack! haha..

  19. March 7, 2017 / 4:24 am

    It looks like you are doing an amazing job of balancing everything. Mom guilt plagues all of us, no matter what our situation. Just know that you are doing what is best for your family!

    • wonderlingblog
      March 7, 2017 / 8:20 pm

      Thanks Anne, that is so true. I often think we try so hard as women to be so many things to so many people, that we often feel like something or someone isn’t getting all that they need..

  20. March 7, 2017 / 5:36 am

    Wow! This post is incredible and your honesty admirable. I am expecting my first child this June and am sheer panic to be honest. But things like your post make me excited. I know it wont be easy, but it will be worth it. I love that you talk about working fulltime and the struggle that can be.

    -Shavon from dreaminginbabyblue.blogspot.com

    • wonderlingblog
      March 7, 2017 / 8:23 pm

      Thanks Shavon. To me, it is the only true endeavour in life. Creating another human being is a miracle and a gift. Good luck to you with your first baby.. it is such a special experience. I’ve written a few more posts about my birth experiences that may help you! Xx

  21. 1stclassrvadventures
    March 7, 2017 / 7:07 pm

    I love this article! I can totally relate to everything you said in here! I really enjoyed number five because now that we are living a simpler minimalist lifestyle it is a little difficult to teach the kids the same being so young and not always understanding. Who can blame them you’re right lol

    • wonderlingblog
      March 7, 2017 / 8:21 pm

      I completely admire you for that. We have discussed frequently doing the same as a family. The entrapments of modern life seem to distract from what is real and important.

  22. beautyaddictmama
    May 9, 2017 / 5:01 am

    Love this post! I really can identify. I also have a two year old – eldest is 4 – and I feel like sometimes I am fighting a never ending battle to do my best as a mum and make sure I raise amazing people. Thank you for being so honest.

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